Diary of what’s gone on since my Mother Died
8:16am My mother just died
I wish to thank all of you for your words of condolences and well wishes; they have helped me so very much as I’ve been dealing with my Mother’s demise.
I hope I never seemed needy , but again you all have helped so much so far.
I know it will take time to deal with all this but I am eternally grateful to have been bless…ed with so many wonderful friends.
I very truely love you all.
I’ve started going through my mom’s things with my Aunt & grandma. It’s so hard, we can only survive a couple of hours at a time before something hits us and the waterworks start.
I found a long letter my mom wrote to me when I was 17… I couldn’t get through a paragraph though I kept it.
In a few hours we go back to f…inish, wish me luck in keeping it together.
as always thanks so much to you all.
i feel dumb saying this but… It has only now sunk in that my mother has died.
Hell I was right next to her when it happened, I saw it.
I guess all the running around with funerary bullshit was a distraction but the more that gets done the more real it gets, and the harder everything else gets.
I don’t know I’m just t…rying to fuck up as little as possible as I get things done.
wish me luck guys & as always thanks
As of today I’m officially overwhelmed & more than a bit nuts, the funeral bullshit is finally taken care of (barring a breif interlude where I was convinced they lost my mother’s body at the crematorium but that is a story I’m not ready to write) the kids go back to school monday and we havent finished the back to school stuff, the funeral home is still taking forever to handle things so when teh urn is finally ready I’m picking it up myself because I dont trust that load of royal fuckwits that run the cemetary.
Oddly enough the final straw for me to totally lose it was my kids breaking a brand new guitar cable that I just spent $25 bucks on yesterday afeter I warned them not to….
I’m so angry I’m shaking —the fact that I went yet another night without sleeping doesn’t help either.
as always wish me luck I really need it