Ants and other failed relations…
For X-mas Kira received one of those new styled ant farms with “Space Age Gel” and “Light Up Action” and like the ant farms of old it included a coupon good for a package of ants for only five dollars. Being the cheapskate that I am, and looking at the ants crawling around on my kitchen counter, I scoffed at that as a rip off and stated I would capture ants myself rather than waste that kind of money.
It’s the middle of March now and I can honestly say I haven’t successfully incarcerated a single one of those six legged, sons of bitches.
I began by simply leaving the top off the ant farm, thinking “Phhbbt… how hard can it be.” Two weeks later not a nibble. I then started leaving shot glasses with a few drops of soda in them to entice them. Nothing.
I started to mix it up, leaving little trails of sugar to the farm, hiding the ant farm amongst dirty dishes, leaving the thing outside, I even tried the tried and true primate “stick in ant hill” technique which actually was the most promising, and would have worked even… If they didn’t happen to be particularly annoyed fire ants.
So yet another object mocks me from the bookcase, and another entire species as well.